Do you struggle to trust people? Are you scared of letting yourself become too emotionally attached? Do you find it difficult delegating at work? Does sharing your goals or being honest about your fears fill you with dread? Are you overcautious about who you do business with?
Trusting people isn’t easy especially if we have had a bad experience in the past. As the saying goes; ‘once bitten, twice shy’ and this is true in life and business.
However, if we want to succeed in our relationships and our careers, we must learn when to trust and when to let go. When we put barriers up, we limit ourselves and make life more difficult.
What are you protecting yourself from?
The first step in overcoming your trust issues is to understand what is causing them.
- Fear of rejection
- Fear of being hurt
- Fear of being ridiculed
- Fear of failure
- Fear of getting it wrong
- Fear being taken advantage of
- Fear of committing yourself
- Fear of not being good enough
Once you understand why you are putting walls up, you can start taking steps to break them down. Where does your desire for perfection or fear of failure come from?
Learning to trust in relationships
If you want to build healthy relationships then you have to learn to trust. Sometimes it can be hard to rebuild trust if that trust has been broken in the past. If the trust has gone from a relationship then it may be time to move on.
You may need to re-evaluate some of the relationships in your life if they are negative. Unfortunately, some of the people in your life may be holding you back. It’s important to surround yourself with positive people who you can trust and rely on for support and inspiration.
The inability to trust may be preventing you from finding love. If you have trouble trusting people then you may be sabotaging your relationships without even realising it.
It is important to appreciate that every person is an individual; just because one person hurt you in the past does not mean the next person will.
Learning to trust in business
Delegation is something that many people struggle with. We often find it hard to relinquish control of a task if we will ultimately be held accountable for its success or failure.
To delegate effectively, you need to understand the strengths and capabilities of each individual in your team so you can have confidence in them. Start by delegating small tasks and gradually you will build trust with your team members and find it easier to delegate bigger tasks.
Making decisions on who we work with can be difficult if we struggle with trust. Will a supplier be able to deliver on time? Will a partner keep up their side of the bargain? Will a client meet the agreed payment terms?
When a business deal goes bad, it can hit you hard but you need to move on.
Learn from your mistakes. How can you improve your systems so you don’t get caught out again? Could you change your payment terms? Can you put better checks in place? Are your due diligence processes sufficient? Do your employee contracts contain noncompete clauses to protect you? How can you build better business relationships?
Learning to trust ourselves
The key to trusting others is to learn to trust ourselves. Having faith in your instincts and confidence in your decision making makes it easier to trust.
When we are betrayed, it is easy to take the betrayal personally. We feel gullible for letting ourselves trust that person and for believing their lies. We feel like we should have known better; we should have seen it coming.
What you need to remember is that these people are the exception, not the rule. Most people will share similar values to us; honesty, integrity, trust. Unfortunately, there are some people who don’t share these values but we can’t let them damage our faith in others or our judgement.
Do you find it difficult to trust?
If you have been betrayed or struggle to trust people, then I can help. Together we will work through the emotions surrounding the betrayal or explore what is causing your trust issues.
If you are struggling with delegating at work or have been caught out by a bad business deal then I can help you move forward. We’ll look at your mission, vision and values and understand how you can achieve your business goals through effective delegation and building positive business relationships.
Once we have identified the root of your problem, we will unlock the skills required to overcome barriers and break down the walls so that you can regain trust and balance in your life and business.
If you are struggling to trust or let go then I’d love to hear from you. Contact me today to start moving forward.